Introduction

At the very beginning of our story, God created marriage. And along with everything else he created, it was good. But when sin entered our story, it found its way into marriages too. Together we’re taking a look at God's intentions for marriage and because Jesus redeems us from the power of sin, he can redeem our marriages as well. In week three, Pastor John taught about three “potholes” that have the potential to cause damage in our marriages: family of origin, finances, and friends.

Quick note: While this is a marriage series, we know not everyone in our church is married. And that’s ok. It’s our intention and hope that regardless of your marital status, God has something new and relevant for you in this series.

Discussion

1. Your marriage will suffer if you refuse to recognize that you are (in part) the product of the generations that came before you. Have you ever recognized behaviors or patterns from your family of origin that have impacted you or your relationships? If so, share with your group.

2. Someone along the line has to take ownership and say, “It stops with me,” when it comes to generational sin. Have you ever addressed what appears to be a behavior, attitude, or pattern you inherited from your family of origin? Why or why not? What might happen if you did? Apply the steps from the application section to move forward.

3. Revisit and read Matthew 6:19-21, Matthew 6:24, & 1 Timothy 6:9-10. Having too little or too much money isn’t the issue when it comes to finances in our marriages. It’s a deeper heart issue in relation to money that can cause damage. When you consider the three passages you just read, where are you aligned with God? Where are you off track? How is it impacting your marriage or relationships, positively or negatively? Apply the steps from the application section to move forward.

4. Revisit and read Proverbs 13:20 & 1 Corinthians 15:33. One of the fastest ways to have a marriage break down is hanging out with people who aren’t aiming in the same direction as you. You need good friends who will provide filters, guard rails, and help you navigate life. Do you have other couples speaking into your life and marriage right now? Are they voices you trust that are moving toward Jesus? Why or why not? Apply the steps from the application section to move forward.

5. While we need healthy Christian couples and friends in our lives, God hasn’t called us to isolate ourselves from the world in a “Christian bubble.” We are to love and engage with our Little Iowa so they see Jesus and know Jesus too (Matthew 28:19, Matthew 5:14-16.) How can you best navigate building relationships on both sides of the Faith Line? How might one support or engage with the other?

Application

• Recognize it. Identify destructive patterns, recurring behaviors, or attitudes.

• Address it. Understand the impact and say it out loud.

• Submit it to God. Acknowledge your limits and surrender control of it to him.

• Create a plan. Find who is going to help, what you need to learn, and what happens next.

• Pray for your spouse. Participate in our 21 Days of Prayer for your spouse. Text “Spouse” to 99581 to receive daily prayer prompts you can use to pray for them.